Podcast 8: How to Build Your Confidence to be Visible
Apr 09, 2020
When we don’t feel confident in ourselves, it gets in the way of us being visible and sharing our work with the world. It’s a huge problem for complementary practitioners, especially when they’re trying to market themselves in these challenging times.
This week’s article was inspired by my interview with Claire Brooker on the podcast. She does amazing work helping her clients build their confidence in an authentic way. Her insights and tips will help you build your confidence to show up and be visible.
What confidence isn’t
Confident people are often thought of as those who shout the loudest. Authentic confidence isn’t about being arrogant or looking superior to others. It’s also not about being perfect and getting things right, every time.
What confidence is
Confidence is about having trust in ourselves and appreciating our strengths and qualities. It’s a generosity of spirit, appreciating life and being compassionate. A place where you cultivate a warm and friendly presence in the world.
Where to start with building your confidence
Start by noticing what your inner voice is saying to you. What stories are you telling yourself about your confidence and being visible in your marketing?
You may find you’re being negative and worrying about what people will think. Don’t demonise what you say, it’s been part of your survival strategy and being visible is threatening. This voice would’ve been useful in times when standing out would threaten your safety.
Unfortunately, this response isn’t useful to you in your marketing. This is where you need the confidence to be visible and showing up in the world.
Soothing your fears
You need to change the story you’re telling yourself and start creating a more useful dialogue. Brené Brown is a great advocate for authentic confidence, and she is an amazing example of showing up in the world as herself.
She uses the phrase “I see you, I hear you but I’m going to show up anyway.” It’s empowering to notice the fear and tell yourself “I’m going to do this anyway”. This is recognising the fear for what it is. Rather than allowing the fear to keep you playing small, you can acknowledge it and decide how you will act instead.
Use this phrase next time fears and worries are getting in your way of marketing yourself.
Doing this work will help you learn to accept yourself, including your quirks – they are what make you human. People don’t connect with perfect, they connect with other humans and this is what attracts your clients to you. Learning to celebrate your own uniqueness may feel vulnerable, but it will help you to market yourself in a way that is unique and authentic to you.
Connect to your strengths
Confidence is about trusting your personal strengths so the route to building your confidence is by connecting to those strengths. Think about the last time you felt proud of yourself, what were you doing? How did it feel?
If you need some inspiration, read the testimonials from your happy clients. Spend time connecting with the experience and enjoy the feeling of deep pride.
Recognise this confidence, practice immersing yourself in the feelings and own them for yourself.
Easy confidence boost
Confidence is about connecting with your strengths, warmth and friendliness. How you talk to yourself and connecting with your inner wisdom will help.
Change your language – change statements like “I’ll try to…” to “I’m going to…”. Another one to change is, “maybe I’ll…” to “I will…”.
As humans, we’re never 100% ready for anything. Fears and worries are human experiences, especially when you start to become visible in your marketing. Embracing your qualities and strengths will help you to shine brightly and build a practice you are proud of.
If you struggle with confidence when marketing yourself, book a discovery call and find out how I can help you.
Podcast 8 show notes:
- Introducing Claire Brooker (1:02)
- Claire’s take on confidence (2:38)
- The Golden Buddha story (3:04)
- Defining confidence (4:34)
- The starting point for authentic confidence (8:16)
- Inner voice – your natural visibility survival strategy (10:48)
- Soothing yourself and this response (12:00)
- Connect to your strengths (14:26)
- People don’t connect with perfect (16:36)
- Being human is enough (18:26)
- An easy win to be confident (19:12)
Links:
Claire Brooker’s website: http://www.claire-brooker.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/clairebrookeruk/
